I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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