Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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