So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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