like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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