I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize