You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Pants are for mortals
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