it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
