nut hugger
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
