Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
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Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
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Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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