I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Randomize