What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
