you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
