she woke up with a sticky ear
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize