I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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