Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I stole a fireplace last night.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
