she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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