Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(630): View more from Illinois

I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me

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(630): I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me http://tfl.nu/7scv

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study

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(780): White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study http://tfl.nu/oth0

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(330): View more from Ohio

Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".

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(330): Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay". http://tfl.nu/1f7s

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(301): View more from Maryland

The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up

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(301): The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up http://tfl.nu/7low

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(252): View more from North Carolina

just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.

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(252): just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far. http://tfl.nu/f1u5

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(989): View more from Michigan

Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.

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(989): Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings. http://tfl.nu/rih3

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping

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(267): that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping http://tfl.nu/gh69

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(302): View more from Delaware

I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.

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(302): I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not. http://tfl.nu/ul0b

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?

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(780): So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends? http://tfl.nu/kqn5

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(219): View more from Indiana

Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.

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(219): Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though. http://tfl.nu/18ka

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(818): View more from California

My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.

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(818): My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap. http://tfl.nu/eas6

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(779): View more from Illinois

I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.

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(779): I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend. http://tfl.nu/p354

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(252): View more from North Carolina

Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.

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(252): Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question. http://tfl.nu/ellm

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??

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(+44): My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts?? http://tfl.nu/jz5d

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(770): View more from Georgia

I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick

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(770): I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick http://tfl.nu/l70j

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