I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present