I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Randomize
