you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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