I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
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Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
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I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
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