Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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