I can't breathe out the right side of my face
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
he laminated a picture of his dick.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize
