There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
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A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
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You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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