i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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