Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Michael Bay diarrhea
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize