Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
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