Well douche your snatch and let's go!
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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