the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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