Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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