I hate all girls vehemently.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
