The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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