I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Randomize
