I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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