I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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