how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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