vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
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