I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
