the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
