Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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