I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
