Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
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