Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize