You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
