I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Randomize