If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
