mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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