I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
