You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
