How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
