hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
