nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
